The sun came up today

The sun came up today.

And it’ll come up again tomorrow.

Yesterday I went into full armadillo mode, curling into an armor-covered ball and rolling blindly through my day.

You’re probably feeling an incredible range of emotions: shock, sadness, numbness, grief, fear, anger, rage.

My heart is breaking for parents of trans kids especially, because I know you’re scared. Terrified even.

Parenting trans kiddos is already a wicked roller coaster ride of emotions, so having your national government (and/or state) pit itself against you and your kids is a really hard pill to swallow.

For now, you can do what’s in your control. Make sure your kids know they are safe and loved for who they are in your home. I cannot emphasize this enough. Lay it on thick.

Let them know how many people are working and fighting for them. People who don’t even know them. And they will never stop.

And please don’t lose hope for a bright and spectacular future for your kids.

Growing up, the modeling I received was to temper hope so you wouldn’t be disappointed. This applied to holidays, birthdays, job searches, faith in people – anything that could leave you open and vulnerable from hoping for good things.

So honestly, I was scared to hope for a good outcome in this presidential election.

Well, here I am, still pretty fucking disappointed, and I missed out on hoping for good things.

Shame on me.

I just read an Instagram post by Austin Channing Brown that stopped me in my tracks:

Hope for progress is a dangerous thing.

But what is the alternative? What would you have rather done with your time and energy? Speaking up was a good use of your time. Working for change was a good use of your energy. Trying to change the world was the right choice.

Would you rather have chosen apathy? Would you rather have chosen silence? Would you rather have swallowed yourself whole? Surely not.

Because hope is a duty.

And your hope is only tangentially related to the fate of the White House. What is always at stake is the deep belief in your own humanity, in your personhood.

What is at stake is dignity and your dignity is always the right thing to fight for. You must hope because you are worthy.

You are worthy of your humanity being honored. You are worthy of equality and equal protection. You are worthy of everything you fought for.

Hope is a duty. Even when it hurts.

Be angry. But not at yourself for wanting better.

What would it be like to live your life as if hope were your duty?

Hoping for better because your kids and loved ones are worthy. Hoping for better because YOU are worthy.

Parents of Trans Youth is still here. We’re not going anywhere.

Our mission of wanting trans kids to be safe, affirmed, and embraced at home and out in the world has not changed. We just have more of an uphill trajectory now.

I’m listening, and you’re asking for support groups, resources, community, and ways to take action. I’m working some pretty cool ways to pull all those things together soon.

And I promise to find myself worthy of hope.

I hope you do too.